Monday, January 1, 2024

Total Surprise Christmas Gifts from a Seekritt Santa!!!

 While getting ready to undecorate the Christmas tree, I noticed several unopened boxes at the far end of the tree blanket, all with my name on each.  Hmmm


In the 1st box was a fisherman's, "Do-It-Yourself" set of nightcrawler bobble-head dolls
For the wannabee musician in me:  OMG!  A brand spankin' new, re-pro, Funky Winkerbean Air Guitar!
I'm not certain if the photos will download for you.  They might be protected

Yesterday was a never to be repeated 1 2 3 1 2 3
Today is the 1th of the month of the 24th
If you're Jewish, you can't mistakenly enter the wrong year on your checks until October 2
If you're Aztec, refer to your pocket Xiuhpohualli.  If you lost yours, see below

In any event, may your days be merry and bright and may all your Budweisers be Lite

Friday, December 29, 2023

Elementary, My Dear Planet

Response to a Brunswick Post, Letter To The Editor 

 Mr. Rand Lennox's 12-29-23 letter, 'The Common Good,' wherein he emphasized all 10 Commandments fitting on a business card to the multitude of books explaining them, re-booted a memory from long ago. 

 Reflecting on math class at the long since closed, St. Hyacinth School, 'fractions' taught us the importance of determining the lowest common denominator on the way to a solution. 

 Fast forward more than a few decades. While pondering the ruination of such a beautiful planet, caused mainly by greed and the dismissal of decency and laws, I hurriedly typed, in jest, 'If I ruled the world, I'd proclaim The 10 Commandments to result in a common denominator of: Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you.' Allow your minds to dwell on each of the 10 and you'll hopefully see the commonality! 

 Fast forward a few more decades where we are today. My mind hasn't changed any, except for that 'rule the world' thought. So, do we make ours a better world or do we continue the path of greed, leading to our prolonged or instant annihilation? 

 Seems elementary to me.

Thursday, December 7, 2023

In time, history will forget

 As a prelude, 5 years ago, I divorced/did the cold turkey thing, from broadcast news. In short time, the tension of it all eased its way out of this old bod. I do read the local newspaper because it carries my need for crossword puzzles and a pretty good cornucopia of chuckle inducing comics!


I don't do social networking because the world does not need to know that Eddie, my pet tsetse fly, dances to Chubby Checker songs. Texting alone has antiquated eye contact and all emotion. I have morbidly obese fingertips that simultaneously activated six letters each time I made an attempt. My smart --s phone has audio texting but I don't like that for the same emotionless reasons.

Now, let's go forward to the past.  Long, long ago, on an island far, far away, inhabitants were awakened as others were startled when the sky darkened as Japanese aircraft pummeled the ships and bombarded the buildings and people at Pearl Harbor. Total Americans killed and wounded was 3581. From that day until WW2 ended, 407,316 military personnel gave their lives and another 671,278 were wounded. Unknown are those who suffered what was then called, "Shell Shock," new name being, "Post Traumatic Stress Disorder." Probably not charted are families having to live with loss, injured and Missing In Action.   From all that and the indescribably 'balls to the walls" attitude of our nation, Tom Brokaw wrote the book, "The Greatest Generation," which should be mandatory reading and discussing for all!

Post Eisenhower's Presidency, there was a time of growth and folks helping each other. Factories emerged, jobs were plenty, houses were affordable and all was good, for most. When the children of "The Greatest Generation" began families of their own marked a time of booming technology, higher education and increasing pay checks. From that, we evolved into entitlements, welfare, partying, drug addiction, bribery, swindles, bankruptcies, video games that show killing without remorse, politicians who promise much, while delivering little and other shortcomings.

Marketing expresses methods for the future of most everything, utilizing history, present behavior and tendencies. Beginning in the 1920s, there was an Austrian, whose name was, Adolf Schickelgruber, who wrote a book about what he perceived as world problems and how to solve them.  If you weren't aware, he changed his sur name to Hitler.  Bingo!  You know what he became, what he did and worst of all, the sheer number of murders committed during his reign.  He did that because he studied current moods and nurtured followers into thinking they too could solve problems while reaping rewards. He also assembled allies in Japan and Italy. Greed eventually led all 3 to their demise.  All the death, destruction and mental anguish for the desire of just one person!

Being that history can repeat, I implore one and all to look around, see what others are doing and thinking.  With an open mind, let it sink in and ask yourself if you truly see a similar evolution.  If you can't or won't, please take time to read, "Mein Kampf" and "The Greatest Generation."  Whether you do or not, ask that person in the mirror if he/she/they really wish to become part of the above numbers.

Neither of the 2 newspapers I read printed a single word regarding what propelled our country into what became World War 2. I spent 4 years with "Uncle Sam" and am damn proud of it! Today, I pray for and salute all those who did the same.  Very sad that I didn't see mention of Pearl Harbor. Hell, what's a mere 82 years!

Remember Bunker Hill-Remember Gettysburg-Remember The Alamo-Remember Pearl Harbor-Remember Pyong Yang-Remember Hanoi Hilton!  Will your children one day say, "Remember America?"

Tuesday, November 21, 2023

How large is the tool that 'wrenches' my soul?

 Thoughts entering my mind even prior to Folgers caffeine minimum daily requirement:

Long beards and overflowing hair atop the shoulders of many politicians does not a genius make. Conversely, it is testament of one's membership in the 'lemmingslature.' Then, again, it might mean a resurgence of Smith Brothers Cough Drops. In a 'recent' survey, Washington, D.C. Uber drivers have hidden video recorders proving covered follicles cannot prevent loss of brain cells. Each time I witness vain attempts at policy improvements, aka, 'open mic' at a comedy club, the old song comes to mind, that being, 'Shave and a haircut, 2 bits.'

Actually, their intent might be, 'If we all have similar looks, we can avoid bring accosted in public. Then, again, won't that cause physical abuse upon innocent people?  In MY state, the 'repre-hensitives' in 'leadersh-t' have waved their longest finger at us by ignoring election passed, gerrymandering bordered, expensive election; removal of all gun registration, safety instruction and firing range protocol; disputing the recent abortion issue; taking over of the education department and played taxpaying utility consumers to an unholy hell with but a slap on the wrist to the thugs who perpetrated electric supplier fraud, with many players never having to appear in court!   

Most perplexing is, some collaborators instilling these 'resolutions' have yet to be awarded the seemingly required full beards and ruffled hair! (Gubernatorial first ladies exempted) Stay tuned for more head-shaking drama, coming soon to us all!!! Rumor mill suggests it will become a reality TV show, tentative name being, "Belief or BS." Leaked Paparazzi tapes show a bloody purse fight between wanna-be producers, Ron DiSantis, Judge Judy, Nikki Haley, Vanna White and Chris Christie. PeeWee Herman declined, fearing bad fan response.

What we need, and soon, is another Dr. Salk, to cure the politico-polio infestation that has adopted strict party alliance, crippled common sense, intelligent reasoning in most, whose thoughts are geared toward re-election and self enrichment/empowerment, combined with memory loss of campaign promises.

If any law is to be passed, it should copy NASCAR, mandating sponsorial embroidered patches on attire worn by politicians. Can you just see a 'Foreclosure' sign on a state capitol front lawn? Or maybe, a Zillow promo on the back of a governor's suit jacket? Or maybe, "Dark Money Laundromat" shoulder patches.

It's time to remove all the "Vote for Me" lawn signs. Folks mistake them for "Garage Sale" invites, thereby causing driveway oil stains from that somehow still moving 1985 Yugo.

Coming up in, 'What's next?'  Kale flavored Holy Communion wafers?

Saturday, November 18, 2023

Do you see what I see?

 "Street Talk" is my local Post newspaper's section with a daily question, mostly regarding current events. Originally, answers had a 90 character maximum, requiring much thought and rework to intelligently present a stance. Respondents are encouraged and are now given 250 characters to express a vote of provided selections or their own. Amongst are thought-provoking, humorous, condescending, awakening, etc. Near as I can tell, all are published, 7 days per week! Though I don't keep track, I estimate an average of 40 plus Post readers take time to contribute and, most days, even more!  Currently, I see many new faces and names. Fantastic! I don't agree with all contributors, but they provide insights I might not have previously considered. Coffee cup in hand, my reactions vary from, insightful, hilarious, the current vernacular's, 'WTF,' to a good, old fashioned, "Meh!"  


You can read a book or column, written by one person, who offers his/her opinion and those who combine opinion with research and proven facts.  My newspaper shows me what the 'by, of and for' really feel, which is why I implore everyone to read, study, learn and THEN make a decision.  Listening to only one is counterproductive. My home delivered newspaper sits on the table, a ready reference, should I need clarification or further thought. So-called 'smart' phones quickly push current events into the past, caused by our addiction to see what excitement the latest 'beep' contains.  My newspapers cover many categories under 'Headline' or section, whereas an iphone/ipad/idunno, etc., requires a separate app for each subject, be it, news, stock market, sports, weather, et al.

Ohio's largest(?) newspaper has transitioned from daily home-delivery, to only 4 days...so far, due to financial hurdles. It provides no daily question. The only reader commentary is derived from, "Letters to the Editor," subject to being reworked and/or shortened, that might appear in less than the aforementioned 4 day delivery.  Very seldom have I seen more than 3 LTEs.  That is NOT considered enviable audience participation!  Might paragraph #1 above be cause for emulation?  

A newspaper provides information from the minds of many, allowing us to make intelligent choices. It's what you can expect in a democracy/republic. When that's gone, your freedoms are close behind.  The lyrics of, 'You don't know what you've got til it's gone' carries a lot of weight!

Subscribe to a local or national newspaper.  The weekly cost is near what you spend for just one cup of a fancy logo coffee shop's mocha latte mint single swirl half mountain lite, that gramma called a percolated 'Cuppa Joe.'

Finally, you'll provide jobs for many who do their best to keep you 'in the know.'  So, do you see what I see?

Saturday, October 21, 2023

Saturday Sillies

 Why do underwear and socks come in resealable bags but potato chips don't?

My answer: Undies and socks don't have crumbs. The sadist engineers  at the chip factories design ultra strong bag seals, so, when you forcibly yank the bag, it will split in several directions and the chips "will fall where they may!"  

Have you seen the new commercial for the titanium phone?  It's the ad with what looks like molten lava in a swirl combined with low level moaning.  Sounds a lot like Timmy Leary experiencing his initial experiment with LSD, dontcha think?

Howse come you don't hear anyone say it that way any more?

If you believe you've seen any of the below listed humor blocks, please report them to Sean Hannity

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program...................

Friday, October 20, 2023

In need of a medical exorcist

 10-19-23: A gorgeous day for a drive to the Parma, Ohio V A Clinic, wherein I have a covid inoculation appointment for early afternoon.

All went well,,,a mere needle pinch.  As requested, I stayed 15 minutes as a "just in case" measure.
Hi ho, hi ho, 'twas back to home I drove!

(Meanwhile, back at the ranch): Post Lunper, I began the stretching regimen as prescribed to loosen one of those polysyllabic muscles that arrived post spinal surgery.  On the 1st pull, I realized a minor ache was beginning to travel.  My upper left arm got some real resistance from the rubber elastic strip.  Pressing on, I finally completed all the reps.

23:15: Time for sleep.  NOPE!  During that toss and turn routine, which compared to a marathon in the industrial clothes dryer at Maudy Frickert's 'Dirt-N-Flirt', the "Olde Bod" began to ache a bit more and felt akin to a small dose of C-4.  Hey, Mr. Sandman, I'm supposed to be in a time slot of total rest!  Instead, my cranium is filled with waves of Tylenol tablets dancing in there!  Sugar plums must have hitched a ride with all the  hummingbirds down to Mexico, et al.

10-20-23: At 01:35, I'd had enough!  The body cried for a healthy stretch.  YOU know, it's probably the initial mega ache at the onset of the flu.  Lordeee, I stretched so hard, I could almost pull a shirt off the closet pole, with my foot!

Mustering strength, I retrieved a digital thermometer from the med stash and started the trek to Recovery Road.  My right temple displayed 100.6.  For kicks and giggles, the lower left abdomen showed 99.8

The next few days might be similar to scaling Everest on a Western Flyer Unicycle, but there's no backing off. 
My Ammo-Med belt is loaded with Tylenol, Colloidal Silver and Oscillococcinum, the mainstays used in 2020 because there were too many co-vid questions and not enough positives to comfort me. My 2023 decision is based on tons of reading and questions to pharmacists, knowing peers and medical grads.

My advice, especially for those who now look through the steering wheel:  Make soup and potato pancakes, rub Vick's on your chest and upper back, then wear a sweat shirt, keep a heating pad nearby, have a nap, park your butt and don't venture out unless it's posolutely necessary and don't kiss anyone unless that frog on the lily pad has a notarized and signed statement!