Longing for Warm Weather

(Originally written in 2003 to the UDF Customer Relations Dept.)

During the Fifties and Sixties, on the southeast side of Cleveland, Ohio, stood an old brick building, which housed Meyer Dairy. They processed milk, then delivered it throughout the neighborhood, to the Mom & Pop stores and to the forerunners of super markets. In front of the processing plant, on the corner of Lederer Avenue and East 65th Street, was "Dairyland." Inside was a fountain with stools, square tables with sturdy aluminum chairs and a jukebox upon which a song was a nickel and you could hear 3 for a dime.

Most any time you visited, at the table nearest the jukebox, sat "Charlie", the bookie. We never saw any deals take place, but the reputation was enough to invoke awe in the minds of any pre-teenagers. Most of us didn't know what a bookie did, but Charlie did at least look like one! Although he was nice enough to us, we gave him plenty of room. It's not that we were afraid, it's just that we didn't know what a bookie might do to us if we did anything to upset him. This was prior to sexual abuse and kidnapping, so we weren't thinking about those things.

Those were the days of unlocked doors. I don't remember having a house key back then. Neighbors kept a watch on things that would cause envy in the best FBI agent. They had the best hearing...if you walked the streets after dark, you could see a window curtain move ever so slightly...movement caused by the night guard. I'm not sure if any of the old-timers ever slept!

The most violent scene witnessed was an occasional brawl between 2 guys over the claim on one of the "chicks" at the Friday night sock hop. If you're too young, the junior high school played 45 RPM records in the gymnasium to keep us occupied and you had to remove your shoes to prevent damage to the floor. Thus the term, sock hop. A hard-earned quarter got you admission to the Olympia Theater with enough left over to buy a 10 cent box of popcorn. Wow...14 cents to see a newsreel, several cartoons, coming attractions and two full-length movies!

Back to Meyer Dairy. A small fountain Coke was a nickel and so was a small bag of Dan-Dee potato chips, made right down the street. The very best part was the ice cream. It was the model of consistency and very difficult to choose which flavor you'd have that day. With money being very tight immediately following the Korean War, and, wanting to get the most for our money, we'd wait until Mrs. Nemec was behind the counter. Small in stature, she'd swoop that one piece ice cream scoop like Paul Bunyan swinging his axe to form the Grand Canyon, causing your eyes to nearly pop out when you saw the size of that scoop on top of the cone. We'd savor and lick for what seemed like hours, as this was the height of our week! If the weather were humid, we'd have to eat it quickly or else the ice cream would melt its way through the cone. Being inventive, we'd make it last longer by biting off the bottom of the cone and sucking down the ice cream with closed eyes and nothing else mattered. By the way, a one scoop cone cost 9 cents. If you had saved enough for two scoops, it was a challenge to keep them balanced while you worked hard to keep it from melting down onto your hand. I can't remember how much a pint or larger container cost. The cones are what I most fondly recall and the picture of Mrs. Nemec performing to the delight and anticipation of a young child.

I came home from a stint with Uncle Sam to find that Meyer Dairy had closed and Dairyland was no more. Gone were Mrs. Nemec and Charlie, the jukebox, the tables, the nickel Cokes and the ice cream cones. Today, it's all flat ground where Dairyland once served the neighbors and elicited countless faces to break into smiles as wide as the side view of a canoe. There have been times since when I've not had ice cream, but I've gotten back on track in the past 3 years. Nothing can replace Dairyland and I suppose good memories overshadow the taste of today's flavors. My ultimate back then was chocolate-marshmallow because it was the way the marshmallow was swirled into the chocolate.

My travels have taken me in search of that old-time flavor and have all ended in disappointment...UNTIL...a very good friend treated me to some that's made by United Dairy Farmers. I consumed a goodly amount of it that evening! It's the first time in thirty-some years that I've been able to associate the taste with the memory. Thank you, UDF! Funny how a small act of kindness and a some good ice cream can conjur up so many memories.

Anonymous Oldie---Almost a Sooose?

Four all who reed and right (?)

We'll begin with a box and the plural is boxes;
but the plural of ox became oxen not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
yet the plural of moose should never be meese.

You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice;
yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?

If I spoke of my foot and show you my feet,
and I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those,
yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
and the plural of cat is cats, not cose.

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
but though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
but imagine the feminine, she, shis and shim.

Let's face it - English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;
neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England.

We take English for granted.
But if we explore its paradoxes,
we find that quicksand can work slowly,
boxing rings are square
and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing,
grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend?
If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes, I think all the folks who grew up speaking English should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.

In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?
Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?
Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same,
while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down,
in which you fill in a form by filling it out
and in which an alarm goes off by going on.
If Dad is Pop, how come Mum isn't Mop?

Author Unknown or is it Knotknown

Giving to and Helping Others

What Prompts YOU to Give?

Years back, my “Taking on the World,” 20-ish daughter would pop over to help watch, “Life Goes On”, a TV show about a family raising a son with Down’s Syndrome, in addition to the healthy siblings. The stories were almost always touching, so I re-named it, “Make Me Cry”, reflecting my “tough” child’s weekly response. Oh, I too had my share of hard swallows!

Since then, we’ve had the likes of, *Touched By an Angel, *Joan of Arcadia, Extreme Makeover-Home Edition and now, Oprah’s, The Big Give. Granted, some *stories were created in the writing room, yet, I felt someone was indeed experiencing a similar problem. I hardly ever miss Extreme Makeover. On one hand, I am SO proud of how a community unites to rescue people from the cracks of life. On the other hand, it upsets me that perhaps nothing would happen without the intervention of Ty Pennington, his gang of “elves” and all the donating sponsors. Granted, donor companies get a tremendous amount of low-cost exposure, but that’s how the world spins today. On the third hand, maybe we truly are at the point of re-awakening the spirit of man helping man!

I spent 9 years with a ministry and food bank assisting a multitude of the poor, fire victims, homeless, abuse victims, drug/alcohol rehabs, physical/mental dependents, down-sized job loss, low income and anyone else needing help. There’s not enough space to say how easy it was to get sick or really upset at some of the conditions in which people barely exist. It can get to you, but you become as does the battlefield Medic who treats quickly to stop the bleeding, then moves on to the next of the oh so many wounded.

There’s a book in all of this, but for now, you just need to know that many outsiders could not/would not believe how much a small group could accomplish, but we had the records to bear witness. In many neighborhoods are small advocacy groups who sleep very little in the quest of helping others get at least some of what they need. Their budgets don’t allow for advertising, so you might have one on your street and not even be aware.

SO…what can YOU do? Your cupboard or pantry definitely has canned/boxed groceries that never got past the good intention of a new recipe. Included are items that you couldn’t pay the kids to eat. Donate them to the local food bank. Hunger goes beyond holidays! Dressers and closets teem with clothes worn once or never…some still tagged! There are utensils, duplicate dishes, pots and pans that will never cook tapioca on your stove. In the linen closet is a sheet, blanket, pillowcase or towel that will never get off the bottom of that pile. Walk around the house, garage and basement. Outside of holiday decorations, if you haven’t used it in a month, odds are you never will.

Open the phone book or go online to locate organizations that can re-use your serviceable offerings. Some will pick up. Ask for a tax deduction receipt. Donate clean goods, working appliances and unbroken furniture. If you belong to a church, tell them what you have available. Chances are, someone in the congregation or neighborhood needs it and not much gasoline will be used to transfer it. You can help and you’ll feel better for having done so. Also, it never hurts to say “hi” to a stranger, pass along a smile, give a hug and even volunteer. And, there you have it!

I and Others Have Often Wondered.....

Why do we run from the rain, but not the snow?
Where would you buy furniture made from Holly Wood?
How can you tell if you're on the Teeter or the Totter end?

Was God mad at some people when he assigned laughs?
If 2 lines are parallel, is 1 line a lel?
Why can't you hear "ping" or "pong" when playing table tennis?
In sports, why isn't it called the "FAIR" line?

How many points are on a co-star?
After morning has broken, who's responsible for the repair?
How do you know when to wind up or wind down?
Is corporal punishment more severe than PFC punishment?
Does anyone play Frontgammon?

Do Australians call the rest of the world, Up Over?
Does "Killing Time" damage eternity?
Howse come Tarzan doesn't have a beard?
Why does day break and night fall?

Are substitute band leaders called semi-conductors?
Did Noah keep his bees in arc-hives?
Do Roman paramedics issue blood from a 4?
Have you ever imagined having no hypothetical situations?
If pushed for time, would a pilot be able to take a crash course?

Wouldn't you eventually get hungry on a non-stop flight?
Is it unlawful to run while carrying a Walkman?
If swimming is good exercise, why are seals fat?

Would you gain weight if you jog backwards?
When a Chinese dancer spins, does he get dis-oriented?
How do you decide between fat chance and slim chance?

How does the snowplow driver get to work?
If a cow laughed really hard, would a farmer spew out of her nose?
Wouldn't you oversleep if your alarm clock went off?
Why isn't palindrome spelled the same in reverse?

How could you forget to spell mnemonic?
Is there a penalty for listening to AM radio in the afternoon?
What do the Chinese call their expensive dinnerware?
What do you call a male ladybug?

Oh, Those ComMERcials!

Did someone misread a calendar? Several weeks ago, I heard a Mitsubishi commercial espousing the virtues of its 2009 model...yes...2009! Last evening, Toyota began talking about ITS units for 2009. Where are all the 2008-s?!? Speaking of Toyota, their slogan, "Ask someone you know who drives one" took me W-A-Y back to a similar ad for Studebaker-Packard urging the listener to, "Ask the man who OWNS one!" hmmm.

Thinking I'd never see it again, Mickey D regurged the man in a bowling shirt who finds it necessary to lean over the ship's bow to eat his fish sandwich, when a dolphin snatches it. Good Grief, Charley Green!

Great carry-over from Soooper Bowl Eks Ell Eye Eye is from Tide, overtalking a young man with stained shirt at a job interview. Can't you just see Chevy Chase doing that?

And...I forever love the sale, wherein the announcer proclaims, "Everything is priced to sell!" Does that mean some stores wish to KEEP their inventory?!?

I'm sure you'll think of many more, but this was to merely get your O-Neg on the flow.

What's In a Word...........?

If the world knew my name, it never would experience…
A weakened spirit
Covetousness or theft

If the world knew my name, it would never experience…
Infidelity or murder

If the world knew my name, it would never experience…
Wars or famine…

If the world knew my name, it would never experience…
Disease or drugs

If the world knew my name, it would never experience…
Locks, fences or gates

If the world knew my name, it would ALWAYS experience…
Honor

Who AM I?

My name is.....Truth

Email from The Big Guy In the Sky

Hi! Remember Me?

I gave you a world of beauty that you could enjoy

I gave you the land and the waters to use for food and shelter

I gave you commandments to use as your guide

I gave you a conscience as a reminder

I gave you each other that you could procreate and pass on all that you learned

I gave you richness of spirit for you to share with all

I gave you intellect that you would use to improve the lives of everyone

I gave you choices that you could make to become better

I asked for nothing other than that you teach what I have taught you

I wanted nothing other than that you pass along the love I have given you

NOW look at what you’ve done!!!